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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

I treated myself to a new HydraGel Infrared Massager (RRP approx$40)


Between AVIS and shavers that don't work, I think I needed a little relaxation!! I picked the right time to try it out - I have been walking with hand weights for the last couple of weeks and my back is full of tension.

I tried it out on the first night without infrared - just the massager. After about 2 minutes I started to feel better. As I also discovered, it is better if someone holds the massager for you as you can turn into a pretzel trying to reach a certain spot on your back!!

Verdict - AHHHHHH!!

Note: Don't try to understand the terms "hydra gel" or "dampening system" - I was filled with ideas of gel, and damp massages...and that is a little off putting. The truth is, the whole thing is dry, and the weird spring-contraption in the neck of the massager is termed the "HydraGel Dampening System".

Sheesh!!! Biggest dumbest weasel words I have heard for a long time...

Mutter mutter mutter mutter......

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

This is the Q-Link pendant. (RRP$199)



What does it do? How does it work? I'm not going to bore you with the details that can be easily found on the Q-Link website.

I'll tell you what it does, though.... it stops you in your tracks when you are doing your 'nana. Or chucking a wobbly. Or throwing a tantrum, spitting the dummy. You get the idea.

For those of you scratching your head, go to Australian Slang for the translation.

I'll give you an example. The test subject has been wearing the pendant for a couple of months. The story begins at Elsternwick Golf Course - my partner was having a good round. A great round, in fact.

Around the 17th hole (also known as the 8th!) my partner stood at the tee, surveying the green. Three teenaged guys muddled about on the green, taking their time, goofing around, playing with the flag. I could sense my partner was getting annoyed.

Or maybe it was the stream of muttered expletives I kept hearing.

On top of this, another fellow from the hole behind us smacked the ball right onto our tee off point, narrowly missing my partner's head.

He was so caught up in getting annoyed at the three guys on the green that he missed this event. He did not however miss the guy from the hole behind us running up in front of him and striking the ball across his line of sight.

Tired of waiting for the 3 guys on the green, he teed off.

The ball did a majestically horrible boomerang to the right, ending up in the reeds.

Reeds that were in the water. A lost ball.

He got out another ball, teed off and to my amazement, perfectly replicated the one-in-a-million horrible shot. Another lost ball in the reeds.

The next new ball swooped to the right, and landed about 5 metres away, near the reeds. He said calmly "I'll take that one" and started off towards the ball.

He set up the shot and hit the ball. It swerved towards the water like a heat seeking missile, then incredibly hit a pile of rocks in the water, and bounced back to very near its original starting point.

I stared, open mouthed as I watched for what he would do next. After hooking the ball (or was it slicing? I don't know) the ball came to rest behind a very large bunch of reeds. You could barely see over them...

Faced with this situation, I know many people who would have broken a club, jumped in the water, climbed a tree or stormed off the golf course, vowing never to play this f$%@ing game again.

My partner, on the other hand suddenly stopped getting annoyed. He took a deep breath and hit a majestic towering shot OVER the reeds, UP the hill and landing to rest at the lip of the green.

One more chip and a close putt and the ball was in.

In this round, he broke 100 for the first time.

The Q-Link claims to shave at least 3 shots off your score.

Since wearing the Q-Link, my partner has dropped 9 shots. And counting.....

At the 19th hole (the pub) he told me the Q-Link definitely did something. It didn't stop him getting annoyed, but it did make him quickly recover to take control of the game again.

Note: In scoring the penalty shots, we used the Playstation 2 Tiger Woods scoring system.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007





AVIS. AVIS. AVIS.
*sigh!*

It began so simply. A catch up with Dad and my Grandma in Apollo Bay. My partner and I called up AVIS because in February last year we used them to drive out of Melbourne for the night. On that occasion the whole transaction was seamless. I booked on line, got a receipt number, I really couldn't fault them. They even offered an upgrade to a bigger car but I declined because I like to drive a manual!!

This time around, well I don't know what it was. Perhaps the computers were down, at least that's what they said. Perhaps someone on the switchboard was having a bad day.

It started well. We booked 4 days hire for a Hyundai Getz. They calculated the cost at about $159, which was fine. Hunky-dory. Tickety-Boo.

Hmmmm.

The fiasco began when we called back to change the date to the week before to sync up with my sister coming down that week. Simple, you would think - adding one extra day, and moving the booking back 1 week.

The woman on the switchboard told me it would cost an extra $190. An extra $190 for 1 day!!!!!!!! That's more than the 4 days put together!!

I pointed out the insanity of this proposition. It seemed to take a while to sink in. She couldn't understand what it was that I was objecting to. Then she got confused, told me the "computer was down" (it was more likely that she was down) and tried to get me off the phone.

With steam coming out of my ears, I called back, hoping to get a more helpful person. I explained the whole situation again and the lady said she couldn't do anything right now, could she call me back tomorrow?

I took great pleasure in cancelling the booking. The relief was wonderful. But it begged the question, where's the holiday? I still haven't caught up with my Grandma, I still feel bad for giving her the wrong filter replacements for her water purifier jug!!! I shall redeem myself today and send up the right ones!! Another January Christmas present. Oh well....

To be continued....






Tuesday, January 16, 2007

One would think that whiz-bang, new-fangled technology just works, right?

WRONG!!!

I was amazed at the results of trialling this shaver (not on myself, of course........I am a girl, and not a particularly hairy one at that)

Braun Smart Control (RRP$113)



From the advertising, they would have you believe the shaver increases muscle size, makes girls want to fawn all over you and it can even make you taller!!! You also get the impression that you will simply use the shaver and then TA DA! 30 seconds later you will look like this:


.....instead you wind up using the thing for about 20 minutes,
going over the same $#@&ck%#ing patch again and again....cursing and muttering...trying to work out how to coax those stubborn hairs into the weird foil thing..... but they seem somehow afraid.....

finally after what seems like a good half hours effort, you end up with this result:

It's the "half-shaven 3 day growth look", apparently it's very in vogue at the moment. Then you read the instructions for the 50th time and realise that not only are you half-hairy, you now have to clean the thing!!!

Step 1 - remove foil thing, turn coil thingys around.
Step 2 - use brush thing to get the hairs out (they are just as stubborn coming out as they were going in!)
Step 3 - run under water?
Step 4 - spray with ridiculously overpriced cleaning stuff ($15 per can!!!!)
Step 5 - dry, put back in package and sell on ebay!!

Here's to the most expensive paperweight I've ever bought (see Universal Remote Control post)

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

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