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Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Often when something happens in my life that I don't enjoy, I tend to make an amusing post about it. It's my way of making lemonade out of lemons. Sometimes however, you just get lemons.

I was listening to my headphones in front of the computer. The song had ended so I took the earphones off to put them away. Without looking I reached into the wires of an air purifier with my hand still holding the earphones. My middle finger was the entry point and the charge went right through my body and down to my toes. If I had to describe it I would call it "being bitten by an electric eel underwater".

For hours afterwards I was unable to speak faster than 30 bpm and tingles and pains surged randomly through different parts of my body. The next day I was still speaking slowly and had pains in different regions of my head.

The most frightening moment was when I tried to use a computer and spent around a whole minute trying to figure out where the "copy" button is in Ctrl + copy. I felt like a complete dork when I realised it was just the "c" button. Considering I have been using computers since I was a kid, this was cause for concern.

The doctor did a multitude of tests of my reflexes and coordination. He wasn't entirely convinced I was ok, but he didn't want to alarm me either. Little did he know that underneath my vague and slow exterior was already a lot of panic and alarm. He ordered me to rest for a few days and get an Ambulance subscription. That didn't really fill me with optimism.

The next few nights were frightening as my heart was beating quickly and tingles and pains kept their random patterns going well into the small hours of the morning.

After I regained my energy after a couple of days, I tried yoga to get my circulation moving and exercise my muscles. Amazingly it worked so well that by the next day I was feeling like a new person.

I am pleased to say I am feeling back to normal apart from the occasional pain manifesting throughout various areas of my head. This is the first day I have blogged since the incident and I am happy to say I know how to use Ctrl + C again.




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Tuesday, September 30, 2008














My new pedometer arrived yesterday from Ebay land. It is rather snazzy and very easy to set up. You just enter your weight, age, height and step length and it calculates how many calories you are burning throughout the day. I wear it clipped to my belt to remind me to walk more. It's a good incentive to walk instead of catching the tram one stop - you get to thinking "maybe I could add another k to my total!" It becomes a bit of a competition (albeit against yourself!)

Yesterday's tally: 8539 steps, 3.71km and 165.4 calories! - and I wasn't feeling too well that day!

Today so far: 3118 steps, 1.34km, 60.4 calories.

Apparently there were 200 calories in my breakfast banana. And my breakfast tamarillo had 40 calories. There is no danger in my eating more than one tamarillo because they taste a little - how should I say... tangy. I think that's how they are supposed to taste. They make me do the "just sucked on a lemon" look.

I think I could make a million by creating the "Tamarillo Diet" - it goes something like this:

Breakfast:
1 Tamarillo

Lunch
2 Tamarillo

Dinner
2 Tamarillo

Dessert
1 Tamarillo


I can just see the testimonials:

"I lost 50kg in six months!! And I no longer have a vitamin C deficiency!!"


Important note: Please do not try this diet at home. It is a joke. Then again, so are many of the other diets floating around Hollywood. The "Cabbage Soup" diet, the "eat nothing and pretend you're just really busy" diet, the "eat and then spend an unnaturally long time in the bathroom" diet, and then there is the diet followed by many a Hollywood celebrity which basically involves looking in the mirror for long periods and pouting.

It's probably more sensible to just eat a lot of fruit, vegetables, pasta and rice. And make sure you cook with extra virgin olive oil. After all, millions of Mediterraneans can't be wrong.


Pedometer price $4.95 plus $6.00 postage.
Verdict - Success!!



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