At the gym that I regularly frequent, I was presented with a dilemma.  It was a question of etiquette and considering I never went to finishing school OR carried a book on my head, I don't know the answer.  It goes something like this:

I entered the change rooms, ready to get into my running shoes and trackky gear.  This process usually takes me all of about 3 minutes.  The girl at the desk gave me my locker key - number 6.

When I rounded the corner, I was confronted by a woman.  She was completely stark bollock naked with her arms outstretched, and for some reason, her legs outstretched as well, facing the lockers.

Not only that, but she was spread-eagled in front of a particular locker.

Number 6.

My locker.

I knew she had heard me coming in, a slight tilt of her head acknowledged my presence in her vicinity.

So I hung back, not wanting to approach at this stage. 

I have this pedantic thing about not talking to completely naked strangers.

So I thought "well, maybe she just took off her bathing suit.  I suppose she'll dry off, get dressed and THEN I can ask her to move." 

Wrong!

She stayed where she was.  Swaying slightly, not using a towel and still standing like Leonardo's Vitruvian man.

"Oh crap."  I thought.  "Maybe she's air drying?"

She stayed for what seemed like 15 minutes but was probably more like 7.

Not moving.

Being  naked. 

Not using a towel.

Swaying.

"Maybe she's like that serial killer guy from Silence of the Lambs.  I'm definitely not talking to her until she is at least covered up in a towel or something.

She still didn't move.

"Maybe the Blair Witch is coming and she's been told to stand facing the wall.  Maybe I'm next!!  Aaargh!!"

This line of thought wasn't helping me.

I had meanwhile changed into my gear, sat down on the bench.  Waiting patiently, trying not to look directly at the rather frightening display in front of me. 

Then, something bizarre happened.  Another woman and a kid came in and started talking to Vitruvian naked scary woman.  And she miraculously grew clothes within a minimal space of time.

I chose my moment.

"Excuse me, could I get into number 6 please?"

"Oh, yeah, of course!"  she said, like it had been her intention all along.  She FINALLY capitulated and moved herself away.
 
As she disappeared (thankfully fully clothed) through the door with the other woman and the kid, I noticed something else. She wasn't even using a locker.  She could have gone anywhere.  It's a big place.

So I conclude with my not-so-subtle-plea/order/requirement/mandatory idea:

DEAR-NAKED-AIR-DRYING-SWAYING-WEIRDO-PEOPLE-HAVE-YOU-EVER-A-HEARD-OF-A-TOWEL!?!?!?!?

technorati tags: naked woman, changeroom, weirdo, gym, decorum, decency, towel, etiquette

What is Latency?

When you record directly from a microphone or instrument, the audio signal is sent to your computer, converted into a digital signal and then back into analog and sent to your speakers. This is the process responsible for causing the frustrating "lag" or latency effect, where your tracks are recorded "late". When you play back your tracks, your latest recorded track will be out of sync with the first one. If you have experienced this problem, you will be familiar with this effect and you are probably tearing your hair out daily.

Thankfully there are a number of ways to fix latency in Windows Vista.  You can try all of these or just a few to try to fix your latency problem:


1.  Upgrade your RAM


The faster your computer, the less likelihood of latency being a problem.  As the saying goes, "you can never be too rich or too thin".  Or have too much RAM.  Get a memory upgrade to at least 4GB if you can and ideally see if you can upgrade to the maximum your slots can take.  If you are unsure, speak to your nearest tech head or check forums and manufacturers pages.



2.  Download ASIO4ALL

ASIO4ALL is the universal ASIO driver for Win 98SE/ME/2k/XP/MCE/2003/XP64 and Vista/Windows 7 x86/x64.  For some, a quick download of this free program is all you will need to fix latency issues.  You may need to tweak the buffer and latency sliders until you reach an acceptable level of latency. 

4.  Upgrade from Windows Vista to Windows 7.

Unfortunately for many users, Windows Vista is S-L-O-W, notorious for maximizing latency and is known as a problematic operating system for multitrack recording.  I'm going to come right out and say it, it is definitely worth the investment upgrading now rather than tweaking away with Vista until you are blue in the face.  Windows 7 can help your machine work quicker and easier.  The minute I upgraded my laptop from Windows Vista to Windows 7, I instantly noticed the difference in speed.



5.  Get an Audio Interface

How does an audio interface improve latency?  An audio interface will replace your sound card for the time it is on and plugged into your machine.  With direct monitoring, your interface will bypass the latency loop so you hear your sounds in real time.

When I bought my M-Audio Fast Track, I found that it simplified recording into a "plug and play" experience, removed latency and on top of all that, made the recording software fun to use.  You can plug a microphone straight in to the XLR jack and guitar leads (or mic leads) plug straight in to the 1/4 in jacks.  Once you are plugged in, you just start recording.

The M-Audio Fast Track uses a "Direct Monitoring" (zero latency) button, allowing the user to hear the recorded tracks while hearing the track as you record.  For this stage you need to make sure that you have done these two things (important):

* Plug in speakers for monitoring your recordings
* Use headphones to monitor your sound while you are recording

If you have followed these steps, your direct monitoring should work fine.

Minimum System Requirements (PC)

Windows XP (SP3)* or Windows Vista 32/64 or WIN 7

Pentium 4 2.0GHz

1GB RAM

one native USB port

* Home and Professional Edition only. Windows Media Center Edition is not supported.



Minimum System Requirements (Mac)

OS X 10.4.11 Or better

G4 processor**

1GB RAM

one native USB port

** G4 accelerator cards not supported.


Features

- Includes Pro Tools M-Powered Essential software

- Works with most popular recording software--including Pro Tools M-Powered 8*

- 1/4 in. instrument input: Record guitar, bass and keyboards

- Phantom powered XLR mic input: Use dynamic and studio-grade condenser microphones

Stereo RCA outputs: Easily connects to your stereo system or powered monitors


You will need the updated drivers to install the Fast Track on Windows 7.  M-Audio has now released compatible drivers for Windows 7 in 32 bit and 64 bit:

MAudioWin732bit

MAudioWin764bit

Installation

*  Download M-Audio driver (if you don't know if your system is 32 bit or 64 bit, click the "Start" button (bottom left corner), right click on "computer" and select "properties", "system".  Windows 7 will tell you what version you are running.

*  Install the driver exe file by double clicking, wait until Windows 7 notifies you that installation has been and the M-Audio icon shows up in your taskbar:

*  Plug in your M-Audio Fast Track.

*  Plug in your microphone or instrument jack and start recording!



There are more expensive audio interfaces on the market, it just depends on your needs as to which one to buy.  In my case, I needed something simple and this interface fitted the bill perfectly.  By all means, if you have the funds and the inclination, go for a more expensive model.

Other audio devices worth considering:

Behringer FCA202

Focusrite Saffire Pro 24

 

MOTU 828mk3

Important note: what works for some people may not work for you.  Do your research and get independent advice.  All systems are different and results may vary from one setup to another.  There will always be a possibility that an audio interface will not work so understand the risks when taking any advice.

technorati tags: audio, latency, m-audio fast track, personal, recording, shopping, Vista, how to fix latency,how to stop latency, latency in multitrack, latency recording, latency in Vista, latency Windows, usb audio,pro tools 8, audio interface, usbaudio, m audio pro, computer recording, recording to computer, fixinglatency, latency fix, fix latency, m audio interfaces

Disclaimer: although pretty tame, if you are under 18 or easily offended, this is not for you.


I was watching a comedian on TV talking about edible underwear and the concept has floated in my mind for days.

The first question I would ask is "why"?

The second thing that really started to bother me was the "material" from which they are made.  This comedian mentioned the stuff that edible underpants are made from and it's been giving me nightmares.

So it's a sticky, sugary, fruity sheet type thing.  Designed for.. well actually, I don't really want to think about what they are for.  Use your imagination.  Or don't.  Preferably don't.

The thing that bothers me the most is that you are supposed to wear these things as underwear.  I don't want to go into too much detail but there are two problems with this.

1.  It's warm down there.

2.  Hair

Now if you get someone who is over enthusiastic and tries to take these things off quickly...

Well, only a qualified beautician should be allowed to do that.  Under strict, clinical conditions using the proper utensils.


It baffles me how shoving a couple of fruit rollups down your dacks is somehow deemed to be alluring to the opposite sex.

Each to his/her own I suppose.

In any case, if you do ever buy/use/eat?!!?! these things, exercise extreme caution, lest you experience an instant Brazilian.

technorati tags: edible underpants, edible underwear, lingerie, weird, underwear, edible, panties

My latest purchase consists of a great new LED photon light device, used to correct uneven skin tone and various other skin concerns.
 
The device itself is great, works perfectly, I am very happy indeed.

LED Photon Light Device

The part I found most amusing about the whole transaction was the instruction leaflet.  Please note, I am not joking and this leaflet really contains these phrases.

"Colourful Photon Skin Tenderizer"

I'm somehow nervous already...

Main benefits

• Light waves irradiate skin cells

What the hey?...

• Promotes rebuilding of collagen fibers and other flexible fibers

Like cotton?  Or spandex perhaps?  I've got some old bike shorts need repairing...

And finally,

Please stop the operation in case any stimulated phenomenon

Stimulated phenomenon?  What, like my compass and watch stopping on a deserted road?

Trust no one!!!

technorati tags: LED, LED photon, LED light, LED skin, LED photon Skin, red LED, blue LED

I woke up this morning with the distinct feeling that I was going to start being healthier.  I wasn't sure how, I just wanted to do something to push me in the right direction towards Spring tank top weather.

I made the snap decision to start eating more fruit.  Did I start slowly?  No.
This morning I had one Royal Gala apple, two Zespri Gold New Zealand kiwifruits, two mandarins and a partridge in a pear tree!!

Ok, without the partridge bit...

Now I am full of fruit and feeling exceptionally healthy.  One more Royal Gala apple, some avocado and tomatoes at dinner and I have covered most of the fruit families in one day.

The only thing I'm not sure about...  What fruit family is the Cadbury Twix?

technorati tags: fruit, diet, vegetables, fitness, health, fruit diet, diet foods, food diet, vegetables and fruits

For the fifth time this month I have seen an all too familiar sight:

1.  A dog
2.  An absent owner (possibly shopping)
3.  A leash fastening the dog to a pole
4.  The dog shivering uncontrollably

Why?  Because it's COLD!

Dog owners please note:  A dog isn't able to dress itself in the morning the way that we do.  So, to compensate for this canine inadequacy, us dog owners need to dress the dog in appropriate clothing for the weather.  In Melbourne, for example, it has been 2 banshee shrieks close to freezing in Melbourne for the last few weeks.

Okay, that might be a slight exaggeration.  Since we don't really get snow or anything.  But... some dogs (especially small dogs) have a low tolerance to cold.  So if it is 14 degrees outside and you are wearing a scarf, please make sure your dog is dressed too.

It is easy to keep your dog warm and if your dog could speak (yes, I know some do - at least they do on YouTube), it would thank you from the bottom of its shivering heart.

technorati tags: dog accessories, dogcoat, dog coats, dog apparel, dogcarriers, dog clothing, dog jacket, dogsweater, dog vest, dog sweaters, dogsclothes, dog harnesses, dog jackets,small dog clothes , dog life jacket,dogs coat

No, I'm not talking about that kind of herbal!

This morning I woke up at 4:30am.  Then fell back to sleep at about 6am.  Not really the essential ingredients for a good night's rest.  So I braved the health food shop to find something to pep me up.

I needed something that:

Increased energy
Reduced fatigue
Reduced adrenal burnout
Reduced the effects of stress
Improved the ability to concentrate


The only problem is that feeling like this, I found it nearly impossible to find the dang thing.

Firstly I spotted the magic formula on the shelf.  I thought "I'll come back to that after I get my hair skin & nails formula".

Big mistake.

The thing about being scatty and tired and stressed is that you can't remember where you put things.

So to get the vitamins & herbs for my condition I had to try and not feel tired and stressed and scatty.  Which isn't easy to do when it is the very reason why I needed the herbs in the first place.

Sometimes life can just give you one big wedgie.

So after stressing my adrenal glands even more in order to find the blasted vitamins, I struck gold after about 8 excruciating minutes.

Voila!

Someone needs to remind me that it's just easier to buy these things online.


Now I need a Panadol.

technorati tags: fatigue fighter, nutrients, herbs, vitamins supplements, nutra life, health vitamins,

I was browsing the perfumes in the chemist today, admiring the shapely bottles, imagining the spicy and floral fragrances.

I saw a bottle marked "Go" and thought to myself:  Yes.  Go-getter, trend setter, that's me, I'll have a spritz of that one.

After a lengthy spray on my wrists I smoothed a bit on my neck pressure point, finished my purchases and walked outside.

Then it hit me.

What is that smell?

It evokes er...  I can't quite place it... images of stubble... er... hairy sinks... gravel rash... er... DAMN IT!!!

A wonderous waft came up to my nostrils and I realised that blokey-smell was in fact me.


I checked out the blurb on the Go! website:

"...it not only changes the way you smell but changes the way you feel"

You're telling me.

...Could the hint of violet leaf be responsible for catching that girl's eye or not?"

Probably.  I may get a few looks from women thinking "why is that chick wearing aftershave?"

Would it have killed them to put "Pour Homme" on the dang bottle?

I did wonder why it was next to the David Beckham and Old Spice though...


So now, for the rest of the day (and night) I will smell like Eau De Bloke.

technorati tags: joop go, joop, eau de toilette, pour homme, perfume, fragrance, aftershave, perfume forwomen, eau toilette, men's fragrances, men's aftershave,

Eureka!!  Here are a few Firefox Add-Ons and Apps that make life a little bit easier.

I have a sneaking suspicion that every time you log in and out of Twitter, sift through unnecessary emails and cut and paste links, a fairy dies.



1.  Bit.ly sidebar - you can get this from the bit.ly home page and drag it on to your sidebar.  It shortens your links at the click of a button.

I can't understand why I have been cutting, pasting and opening and closing bit.ly all the time.  Duh!  Work smarter, not harder!!






2.  Hoot Suite - Wow.  If you have a couple of Twitter accounts and keep logging in and out, this is the Twitter App for you.  Hoot suite has a "Hootlet" bookmarklet for super easy tweets straight from the source page.  It has an app for Iphone too (what doesn't?)

 Soooo much easier to manage everything.  Great if you want to schedule Tweets (for different time zones, for example)






3.  Feedly - All-in-one feed App.  Imports your feeds from Google Reader and various other sources.  Nice!

4.  Yahoo Mail Watcher - Doesn't use your username and password in a way that could be compromised.  Checks your email while you are doing other things.  Notifies you when a new message comes through.

Heaven.

technorati tags: add ons, firefox, twitter, apps, iphone, feed, applications, RSS, news

1.  Write about a current event.  Read today's latest headlines and inject your opinion into the post.  Your content will be fresh, in demand and will provide a new perspective on the issue.

2.  Take some time to thank your fave bloggers and give them some link love.

3.  Write a silly post.  Sometimes, say, if you write a serious political blog, this may not be appropriate.  But if you can, people love to laugh and if you can think of something silly or funny your readers will appreciate it.

4.  Find a much-blogged about topic.  Then add your own opinion and perspective.

5.  Memes.  Some people love them, some people hate them.  I personally don't participate but if you are searching for blog material, a meme can keep the blogging process going.  Try Wordless Wednesday or Music Monday for starters.

6.  Review a site.  Do you love/hate Tweetdeck?  Do you use Facebook?  Talk about the features that work for you and provide screenshots to illustrate.

7.  Review a product.  You don't have to send away for samples, the product could be a recent purchase (say, an Ipad).  Provide your readers with a detailed review to provide value and insight.

8.  Add a Recipe.  Are you a master in the kitchen?  Just learning?  Make a video or write your recipe for your best dish.  Remember to provide lots of pics (yum!)

9.  Interview another blogger.  John Chow may be a little busy but if you have someone else in mind, this can be a great way to increase your blog's audience.  You can do a podcast or email them the questions and publish the answers in a post.   

10.  Write a top 10 list.  ;-)

technorati tags: top ten, top 10, ideas, blog posts, blog idea, interview, Tweetdeck, Facebook, Ipad

I don't know what kind of drugs they are feeding spammers these days...

I will try (and I do mean "try") to translate this latest offering by nutbags pretending to be internet banking admin people:











Dear Westpac Bank user,

Your Westpac online bank account is currently locked color

Really? I usually use Oxy Clean or lemon juice for those really locked in stains...

and only after you identify on the website
your account will be unlocked face and ready for use.

Oh good. There's nothing worse than trying to do your banking with a locked face. That is, if I can identify on the website. Err...

For added security we will send a Westpac SMS protect Code Color
to you pre-registered mobile phone number,
in order to confirm your identity.

Gee. Yeah. That sounds safe, sign me up. I'm so glad they are going to protect me (sic) mobile phone number.

Incidentally, I'd probably want to confirm YOUR identity considering you didn't pass grammar 101 and use US spellings for Australian victims. I mean customers.

Please follow the link below to request your Westpac Protect SMS Code Color.

Clicking a link in an email from a gramatically incorrect weirdo babbling on about locked colors and unlocked faces.

I don't see how that could hurt...

Incidentally, considering their outrageously obvious errors, they might have done just as well with this email:

"Dear Scumbag,

Weed porn ferret miscreant is dulling your online.
Please click your unlocked war scratchings to envelop your baby back ribs

Sincerely,
Scam Bastard Mother Fridge"

technorati tags: bank, funny, email, scam, Westpac, spam, idiot, scams, email spam, bank scam,bank spam

I have been reviewing my posts over the years and noticed that I seem to have invented a number of words and/or phrases. No, you say, some of these words were already invented when I posted them. Yeah? Well, I... didn't know about them at the time so it still counts as an authentic invention. I think.

Fun Words and Phrases to Expand Your Vocabulary:

Nad Whack - (Verb)
What happens when you swing your arms while walking and don't realise there is an unsuspecting and rather vulnerable bloke behind you.
Ref: Keep Your Hands By Your Sides At All Times

Runnething - (Verb)
Sort of like running but... more.
Ref: Fresh Pots!!!

The ol' sidewinders - (Phrase)
Something you would be showing if you wore a particularly hideous style of jeans. Hint - it involves hair.
Ref: Bikijeans

Mascara Malfunction - (Phrase)
Doing your makeup too fast.
Ref: Mascara Malfunction

Bunker Rage - (Phrase)
What happens when you land in a massive bunker and simultaneously forget how to play golf. Includes new words such as Graghph and Ruh!
Ref: Bunker Rage

Rasthermathugraaaa!!! - (Noun? Verb? Expletive?)
What you say when you unexpectedly get your first birdie.
Ref: Birdie Comes Before Par

Hannibal Lecter Dinner Set - (Phrase)
Something characterised as highly innapropriate.
Ref: Wacky Gifts for Wacky People

Flavor Wave Alien Incubator - (Phrase, Noun)
That thing Mr T. sells on the infomercials.
Ref: Mr T and the Flavor Wave Alien Incubator

Flame Grilled Microwave - (Phrase, Noun)
Hungry Jack's secret cooking technique.
Ref: Hungry Jacks Flame Grilled Burger

Sadistic Gift File - (Phrase)
List of items to buy for people you either don't like or wish to torment for no reason in particular.
Ref: Sadistic Gift File #1 - Gong Alarm Clock

Shopping 2.0 - (Noun)
When shops and nerds collide.
Ref: Canadian Deal-Finding Website

Shopputting - (Verb)
Un-stealing something. For example, sneaking into a supermarket and putting something of yours on the shelves. Note: At the time of writing this post, I was not aware of the term.
Ref: Security Supermarket Threat.

On-Footpath Shopping - (Phrase)
The opposite of online shopping.
Ref: Deals Direct: An Online Shopper's Utopia

Big Hairy Man Boobs - (Phrase, Noun)
The credit for this one goes to a 6 year old girl telling me and my partner about her Dad.
Ref: From the Mouths of Babes

Goat Bagging Mushroom, Frog's Nest Entrails With Lark's Vomit - (Phrases)
Direct result of writer's block.
Ref: F@ck! F@ck! F@ck!

Bat Faeces Soup - (Phrase, Noun)
A good reason to be a vegetarian.
Ref: Bat Faeces Soup

Wedding Sausage - (Noun, Phrase)
Ok, I didn't make this one up. There exists an actual deli item called 'wedding sausage'. But seriously, can you not see a joke here?
Ref: Saving on Groceries

The Hairy Soup Diet - (Phrase)
Rather effective weight loss diet consisting of soup. With the addition of a hair.
Ref: Waiter, There's A Pubic Hair In My Soup!!

Oh, and for those arriving here through the Google search "pubic hair soup", welcome to my blog!!

And... you need help.

technorati tags: shopping, golf, fashion, jeans, new terms, phrases

This morning at the service station, a combination of sleep deprivation, silght derangement and desperate need for stimulants conspired against me when I saw this sign hanging in the window:

"Coffee. You know you want one."

The sign showed a steaming take-away cup filled with caffeine-laden goodness.

Yeah? Yeah I guess I do want one. Mmmm. Enticing. Hang on, I don't even drink coffee...

Caffeine devil sitting on my shoulder says:

You know you want one...

I haven't had a coffee for over a year. I don't feel the need for it. I'm over it, I'm totally um....

(walks zombie-like into service station. Presses "cappuccino" button, frothy goodness filling my cup and runnething over)

Drinks coffee in 2 minutes flat. Eyes wide awake, and I'm WIRED!!!!

Now I know why Dave says:

FRESH POTS!!!!

Language warning: If you are offended by the f-word used in jest with regards to coffee, don't watch this video!!

technorati tags: coffee, cup coffee, dave grohl, espresso

Rant time.

The old 2 minute noodles had a tangy flavour - a kind of salty, zingy hit. Apparently Maggi have taken it upon themselves to do some sort of focus group study.

You know the kind where the "consultant" guy gets paid $750 per hour to talk, well... bollocks.

"Okaaay. You know what 2 minute noodles need? Let's ask a random selection of bland-palated people and see what they think."

"Okay, now they have chosen the cardboard tasteless ones, we need a name"

"We'll brand them as 'EXTRA DELICIOUS' - they'll love it!"


Yeah.

Extra delicious to who? People with a cold?

Thanks to this treachery, we now have 2 minute noodles with very little flavour and barely-recognisable rehydrated vegetables. Vegetables that are still crunchy when the noodles are cooked!! Mmmm....

But you know what? They are now 14 grams lower in fat!! And "ovenbaked"...


Whoopeee.

You know what I want? I want those 14 grams of fat re-absorbed into those noodles so I can have the taste back.

What happened to my ridiculously wrong munchy snack that tastes like real (pardon the pun) 2 minute noodles!?!?

Grrrr!!! ARgh!!!

~End Rant.

technorati tags: maggi, 2 minute noodles, extra delicious, oven baked, new 2 minute noodles,maggi noodles

There is something about being on holidays that messes with the space-time continuum.

1. Time goes waaay to quickly.

2. Alarm clocks become increasingly redundant because for some reason I decided that 3pm was a good time to wake up, and 3am was a sensible time to go to sleep.

3. Calories do not count because I tend to get more exercise on holiday. Being out and about and walking all the time, those chocolate mint sticks have negative calories. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

4. Time is taken up by difficult matters such as whether to play golf or go to the park and go for a walk with hand weights.

5. After 2 days of being outdoors my Neapolitan tan (red, white and brown) indicated that I might benefit from the use of sunscreen.

6. Exactly three days before holidays end, I remember that I really wanted to do this or that and I have officially run out of time.

7. Exactly 1 hour after holidays end, I am planning for my next holiday.

technorati tags: holiday, tan, travel, golf, sunscreen, leisure

I hope everybody had a great Christmas this year. Let's hope for a happy, prosperous and safe new year. Here's to 2010!!
Cheers
LJP

The news has been reporting a number of assaults and robberies at Melbourne train stations - particularly those located on the Frankston/Pakenham/Werribee/Cranbourne lines, plus the city stations. I have observed an interesting (and I think effective) way of driving away the criminal element that seems to be having an effect on gangs of teenagers who like to hang out at train stations.  

I witnessed it first at Glen Waverley station - it's quite simple:

The most hideous musak you have ever heard in your entire life blasted through the loudspeakers. No loitering groups seem to want to listen to the latest musak version of "Tie A Yellow Ribbon" for the tenth time in a row.

Now this is no laughing matter, train stations have become quite dangerous of late and there seems to be a lack of ideas on how to protect the innocent people who just need to catch a train.

The muck-up antics of hundreds of kids were not deterred by this musak onslaught. Probably because the din from hundreds of excited year 12s would drown anything out, even "Reggie Dixon's Tango Treats".

This is a tactic that can be applied at other high risk stations to basically drive people away using the power of uncoolness. This doesn't solve the problem, it's only part of the solution.
Other measures could include extra bright lighting at all stations (not just "premium" stations), effective CCTV coverage. CCTV coverage is no good if there is nobody around to help those in danger. CCTV captures video bytes for the news - the important part is deploying the police, using station masters, ticket inspectors and various other security personnel. These tactics could be used in the loop and inner-city stations to usher people in and out of the city quickly.

The idea of blasting musak acts as a kind of repellant dog whistle to those who would not wish to be associated with "Blame it on the Bossa Nova" or any other other related songs. I noted that Taylor Dane seems to drive people away, and I have observed Anastacia to work just as well. The people at Connex have clearly done their homework because they never seem to play anything like The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Fleetwood Mac or any other artists likely to be appreciated by all.

I suggest Connex implements this policy throughout other stations in Melbourne, along with the vitally important policing and monitoring measures to ensure that crime at Melbourne train stations is kept to a minimum.

technorati tags: dangerous Melbourne train stations, Connex, Melbourne train, crime Melbournetrain, crime prevention, gangs, security

You may have noticed this - you go to the supermarket or grocer and the price for fresh raspberries is rather prohibitive.

In fact, the price of gold and raspberries seem to following a similar trend. And given the choice, I would probably choose the gold.

However, I have found a little loophole that ensures you can have raspberries all year round without taking out a second mortgage.
Check your local grocer or supermarket for frozen bulk raspberries. Bulk? I hear you gasp. Don't be afraid. I have found that for $8, I can get a large pack of individually frozen raspberries that last for months, all at the same price as a small punnet of fresh raspberries.

If you have the room and the resources, growing your own raspberries is another great option.


Here's a great drink idea I discovered while experimenting...
Ingredients:
Soda water
Freshly squeezed lime juice
1 nectarine, cut into segments
4-5 frozen raspberries

Combine all ingredients and pour in the soda water. Refreshing!!
You can substitute the nectarine with peaches, pineapple or any other fruit you can think of.
The beauty of frozen raspberries is that they act as ice cubes and keep the drink icy. After the drink is finished, the raspberries are ready to eat.

Be sure to check out more juicer recipes, and tips on fruit and healthy eating.

Other ways to up your raspberry intake include drinking Raspberry Leaf Tea, getting your own Raspberry Seeds, and cultivate your green thumb by learning how to Grow Your Own.

technorati tags: raspberries, find cheap raspberries, get cheap rasperries, expensive raspberries, drink, recipe

"I've never won down here, so now I have won on every continent, except for Antarctica" - Tiger Woods, Kingston Heath 2009.

At Victorian sandbelt course Kingston Heath on Sunday 15th November, the final round began in a sweltering, dusty and thirsty environment. My partner and I perched upon a not-so-grassy knoll at the 1st hole to witness the tee shot of the world's number 1 golfer, Tiger Woods.

The day began with an accidental breach of security - my partner and I wandered past three security guards and almost stumbled on to Tiger's range session. It was only when I caught a glimpse of the famous final day red shirt and a security guard asked us did we have our IDs, that I realised that we were on the other side of the fence and in player's territory.

The excitement was building even before we reached the course itself. On the shuttle bus we downed a 2 litre bottle of water to ensure the proper hydration for the day. During a quiet moment a man with one of the loudest voices I've ever heard yelled:
"Do you know what time it is?"
Curious people turned to look.
"IT'S TIGER TIME!!!" The whole bus broke into laughter and in a moment of comic relief we realised just how excited we were to be seeing Tiger on the final day.

After following the field for a time, we grabbed some (incredibly overpriced) lunch and proceeded to the 6th hole where we were ready to shade ourselves for a while. Then we looked towards the 5th at what appeared to be a million colourful ants headed our way.
"What are those crowds doing?"
"Oh sh!t! He's here already." We scrambled into position as the hordes mustered in.
A young boy sat at our feet and kept voicing that he wanted to say something to Tiger.

When Tiger walked past, only a couple of feet away, the boy worked up the courage and said "You're a Gun Tiger!"
Tiger stopped for a moment, turned around, smiled and said "Thank You" before making his way to the tee. This is the type of memory that will remain long after the tournament is over.

Greg Chalmers (AUS), Francois Delamontagne (FRA) Jason Dufner (USA) and James Nitties (AUS) were snapping at Tiger's heels for a large part of the tournament. At the 14th, Chalmers was set to take the lead. We revelled in the brilliant display of skill and accuracy by these incredible players, and cheered them on - if Tiger was to be beaten, it would be fitting for an Australian to do it.

We began to get slightly sunburned - making our way to the 16th we were rewarded with both shade and solitude. From our perfect vantage point we watched a parade of golfers, Adam Scott, Rod Pampling, Stuart Appleby, and after checking the scoreboard, we saw that Tiger was -14 and looking good for the win. When Tiger appeared, the galleries were bursting with people, yet we had the perfect view and very little crowd around us. We were close enough to see Tiger brush away a fly, re-compose himself and hit one of the most awesome shots I have seen in my life. The ball landed on the green so perfectly it nearly went in the hole. It was awe-inspiring. Needless to say, we made some noise.

When we gathered round the green to watch the putt, a little boy sitting on his mother's shoulders stared at the players, open mouthed in awe and wonderment. He kept repeating the same thing over and over. "Tiiiger Wooods." The crowd started to giggle after a while as the boy repeated it for the 10th time. Then he got a quizzical look on his face as Tiger stalked the putt and lined it up from every angle.
"Is he gonna hit the ball?" The setup phase was obviously getting to him.

It was not until the very last hole that Tiger could relax. As we know, anything can happen in golf. Woods approached the 18th, made a 2 putt and sealed the tournament win to yet another colossal roar from the crowd. We witnessed the gold jacket and trophy presentation, surrounded by thousands of people. Last year we watched Rod Pampling receive the same accolades to a largely empty stand. It is expected that the new surge of enthusiasm for Australian golf spurned by the worldwide publicity will lead to larger galleries at all Australian golf tournaments. Players such as Rod Pampling, Robert Allenby, Karrie Webb and many other noteworthy Australian golfers deserve more publicity and greater accolades in their home country - perhaps this will be the start of a new era in Australian golf.
















For some, this was their first experience of a golf tournament, the spectacle of Tiger Woods and curiosity taking them into new territory. The tournament was a great promotional tool for Victoria, for Melbourne, and for Australian Golf. It is easy to forget that throughout the ages Kingston Heath has been host to a number of legends, including Greg Norman, Severiano Ballesteros, Sam Snead, Gene Sarazen, Jack Nicklaus, Walter Hagen, Arnold Palmer, Tom Watson and Gary Player. It would be a magical touch to begin a tradition of hosting the Australian Masters at Kingston Heath every year, as they do with the US Masters in Augusta.


Tiger won with a final score of -14, followed by Greg Chalmers at -12 and Francois Delamontagne at -10.
















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technorati tags: australian masters kingston heath, Tiger, Woods, Australian, Masters, 2009,Kingston, Heath, Golf, Tournament,Greg, Chalmers, James, Nitties, Francois, Delamontagne,Putting to win, Golf Swing Analysis, Golf Swing Analysis, Golf, Free Golf Lesson

The Masters at Kingston Heath in Melbourne has created Tiger fever for Australian golf fans and non golf Tiger fans alike.

Since Tiger Woods has arrived in Melbourne, the sports section of the news, previously dominated by AFL and Rugby, now finally recognises golf as newsworthy.














I will be attending the final day (Sunday 15th) of the tournament. I am rather excited to say the least. Jumping out of my skin might be a better way to put it.

Melbourne's journalists and photographers are engaged in a Tiger-spotting frenzy. This can only be a good thing for golf in Australia. It is likely to generate interest from many curious sports fans who may never have seen a golf tournament in their lives. This is also a great opportunity to get kids interested in golf in Australia, with Tiger as the perfect ambassador.

After 18 holes and a morning tee time, Tiger finished Day 1 of the JBWere Masters at 6 under (a score of 66), tied with James Nitties and Brandon Grace.




High Definition TV Coverage of The 2009 JBWere Australian Masters:

Thursday 12th November
Nine / NineHD - 12:00pm - 5:30pm

Friday 13th November
Nine / NineHD - 12:00pm - 5:30pm

Saturday 14th November
Nine / NineHD - 12:30pm - 5:30pm

Sunday 15th November
Nine / NineHD - 12:30pm - 5:30pm

technorati tags: Tiger Woods, Kingston Heath, Australian Masters, Masters, Golf,HD,TV








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