This morning I encountered the first sign of blossoms beginning to peer out from the frostiest winter I can remember. In fact, winter can f___ off. Now is the time to count down the days until spring arrives to thaw us all out.
On my journey this morning I thought I had discovered some mystical crop circles in a field. It turned out to be the work of an ordinary hoon doing creative burnouts on grass.
For some reason this brings me to the whole "Kevin Rudd was caught going into a strip club" furore.
1. Who cares?
2. Who cares?
3. Refer to points 1. and 2.
I mean really, are we that repressed that we can't accept politicians being human? I myself have been too drunk to remember being dragged into a strip club by nefarious friends. And I'm a girl. What amazes me is that people are discussing it on radio, on TV, the newspapers scream "Kevin and the Strippers" etc. etc. ad nauseum.
Does nobody remember Malcolm Fraser with his trousers off?
What amuses me is that Alexander Downer may be behind the convenient leak.
What's even more amusing is that if Alexander Downer were with the party at the strip club, he would be more likely to be dancing in a g-string on the podium.
And what's with the wowser mentality in Australia? I'm not saying everyone should go out and get pissed every night but being very drunk on a few occasions in one's life is hardly cause for concern. If parliamentarians were drinking raucously every night and Kevin Rudd turned up drunk to parliament question time, that would be another thing.
And for goodness sake, have we forgotten already? In 1955 Bob Hawke held the beer drinking record 2.5 pints of beer in 11 seconds. Don't try this at home kids.
Can we get back to the real news now?